Thankful Revolution Commentary: Sexual Addiction and Weiner - is he or is he not a sex addict?
Photo Credit: REUTERS/Shannon Stapleton “Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) departs after announcing his resignation from the United States House of Representatives during a news conference in Brooklyn, New York, June 16, 2011. Weiner resigned on Thursday over a weeks-long Internet sex scandal, succumbing to bipartisan calls for him to step down. “
Dr. Peele says Weiner’s not a Sex Addict – Online Behavior and others in the medical professional community offer a different viewpoint.
The Weinergate sex scandal sheds light on the rising problem of sexual addictive behavior like sexting, sex emailing, Internet usage and social media’s new age of Instant access.
According to Stanton Peele, Ph.D., J.D. and his article in Psychology Today, Anthony Weiner is not a sex addict. Peele supports his statement by giving the definition of addiction and dependence from the American Psychiatric Association diagnostic manual as being one “focused on the negative consequences of a substance involvement despite these health, family, legal, job consequences, the addict is still not able to desist”. Peele further shares when one is dealing with addictive behavior they are unable to control their compulsive behavior even if it causes harm, embarrassment, or negative consequences. In his article Peele points out the addict, is one who is “recognizing their behavior is hurting them, they attempt to quit or to cut back, but repeatedly fail at such efforts; still, they continue in their addictive pursuit, even as they regret it and may hate themselves for it.” Finally, Peele’s argument is Weiner seemed to be a “happy Internet Philanderer” and “he didn't seem to let his sexting interfere with his job, his media appearances, even his relationship with his wife -- who was, according to reports, unaware that anything was amiss.”
By Peele’s very description, Anthony Weiner’s behavior demonstrated a lack of ability to refrain from sexting, emailing and calling multiple women exhibiting a sexually compulsive activity. Dr. Patrick J. Carnes author of Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction offers more insight into the behavior of a sex addict sharing, “sexual addiction is defined as any sexually-related, compulsive behavior which interferes with normal living and causes severe stress on family, friends, loved ones, and one's work environment”. Furthermore Carnes shares that the sexually addictive behavior has no set pattern and can be demonstrated in varied of behaviors including those that Weiner shared online publically, “exhibitionism, voyeurism, and indecent phone calls”.
Dr. Dave Moore, a licensed psychologist and chemical dependency professional offers his take that supports Anthony Weiner demonstrated sexually addictive behavior that eventually led to his congressional seat resignation, “addiction is a persistent, compulsive dependence on a mood-altering behavior or substance.” Dr. Moore furthered explained why Weiner’s online activity indicates a compulsive behavior that is out of control, where Weiner would benefit from treatment; “the key word here is compulsive--meaning you can't regulate it to consistently avoid negative social, emotional or physical pain all of which is behavior-qualifying Weiner for addiction treatment. “
Weiner’s lewd activity sexting, phone calling and emailing multiple women for many years before and even during his marriage indicates this is a long-term behavior of sexual compulsion. In an article by Josh Ault, Cynthia Gamble who is a licensed marriage and family therapist, shared that Weiner does indeed have a problem, “sex addiction happens over time and most addicts will not get help until they are caught”. Gamble indicated in Ault’s article clues of behaviors indicating sexual addiction that includes:
“…if someone needs to always check their computer. They carry the phone with them when they go to the bathroom. If they got a personal phone and they have a pass code on it, and they don't want their spouse to have the pass code. I feel that is beyond what I consider privacy. Most of the time that happens at home, but when it doesn't it can happen in other places like their place of work. Someone who is a cheater will walk away and someone who is addicted needs help to walk away."
There is still much controversy over whether Weiner’s behavior is even defined under the traditional sexual addiction terms, yet the evidence is mounting that with the availability of online access activity, like pornography; sexting and sex emails fall under the sexual addiction categories. Kenneth Paul Rosenberg, an addiction psychiatrist at Weill Cornell Medical College shares in an article by Paul Farhi, “sexual compulsivity doesn’t require compulsive sex or even physical contact with another person, it entails repetitive, sexually oriented behavior involving risk, whether to one’s career, marriage and relationships or reputation”.
Therefore, the bottom line is many professionals believe Weiner’s behavior and repeated actions over the course of many years with several women is not simply indicating an inflated ego. The views from other professionals disagreeing with Peele, is that Weiner shows characteristics of being out of control to the point of risking everything even his career and possible marriage. According to Helen Friedman a St. Louis clinical psychologist, “sexual compulsives know they’re out on a limb but often can’t stop, just as substance abusers and compulsive eaters, gamblers and shoppers can’t turn off their obsessions”.
Peele may offer one point of view that Weiner is not a sex addict, however many others in the professional medical community mount a substantially contrasting case.
It is the opinion of this writer that Weiner should seek professional help, get spiritual guidance and find alternative ways to conduct his personal and professional affairs. Weiner shows the classic signs of one possessed with the compulsion to be sexually lewd to the point of his current public shame and political debacle. His behavior resulted in personal and professional embarrassment, negative consequences, and potential irreversible detriment to him and his marriage. I believe his behavior does speak to a person operating under the guidelines of sexual addiction. The fact that he conducted his affairs online and not in person does not preclude that his activities indicate one driven by sexual addiction. According Simon Mann’s headline, “Twitter attraction proves fatal for Weiner.” The age of the Internet and usage of social media just increases the chance of being exposed quicker and on a larger scale having a worldwide audience as in the case of the Weinergate sex scandal.
Weiner’s new directives should be cease and desist from Twitter, operate with high accountability, and avoid the temptation to engage in secret liaisons.
Below Anthony Weiner’s official letter of resignation as posted in June 20, 2011 article by Elise Foley at Huffington Post:
By Miriam Stevens | June 22, 2011 | miriamstevens@fullsail.edu | http://thankfulrevolution.blogspot.com | Week Four Discussion Board WIM Commentary
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